dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize