Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
He felt like a one man threesome
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I need to calm my uterus...
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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