Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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