Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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