Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize
