i jhust puked up my retainher.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
