This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Randomize
