Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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