You made me cry and you don't even care
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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