i just made my gag reflex go away.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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