Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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