Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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