god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
