we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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