Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize