Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Randomize
