With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Randomize
