the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
