Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
