So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize