Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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