I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
