I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
