How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
