Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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