i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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