I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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