i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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