shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
