so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize