he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
