Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
