I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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