I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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