fuck your aforementioned shoe
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
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You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
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I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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