Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize