Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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