Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
