Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
