If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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