actually, I'm a sock model
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
we should paint friendship bongs
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
