take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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