don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize