If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
