Me. At least after what I've been through.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
