fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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