I feel like I'm in dance class right now
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
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