ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
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