i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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