let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize